From my horoscope...

"The warrior within you may be stirred today, and you might have some self-doubt regarding your actions, DUNIA. Maintain confidence that you are on the right path at all times. You may find that there is a bit of tension in your world, but try not to get too worked up over it. This is just a passing phase, and you shouldn't overreact and think that you are completely wrong in regard to something you are doing."

We had a really great gig last night, maybe a little loose, but overall I think we were well-received. This baby sleeps right through these shows. He just woke up afterward to turn over. I am pooped right now though. I slept beforehand and everything. Ah well, so it goes. Soon I will sleep again.

Only about 15 weeks to go...

I think I may be starting to freak out a little. I hope I'm up to this task. The world is such an unfriendly place. I'm starting to try to make everything perfect, and am failing because perfection is a myth. At least the squeaky clean perfection I keep imagining is a myth. Real perfection, in the real world, where it is a joy and a pleasure to have one's head hit the pillow each night and wake up to a new day each morning, is a different matter altogether.

I am experiencing pregnancy brain in full force today. I feel liek I am writing everything down, but I am seriously forgetting things. I burned a pot of soup last night while getting obsessed with repairing my ailing ibook. I keep craving salads but I only like the ones I make at home. I'm becoming a recluse. I can't really deal with people because it makes me sleepy to socialize. I feel like I'm falling apart.

The baby is becoming more and more active. Maybe I am focussing too much on him. I do sit and watch him hoping for a little surface action. He plays games with me. He seems to enjoy reggae and Aram's voice. And so far he's been very relaxed during performances. (I'm trying to think about him because I feel so yucky.)

I hear it's cold and snowy in NY. Please dress warmly over there. Talk soon.

There is still slavery in the world.

This story made me cry, and I don't think it's the hormones.
BBC NEWS | Africa | 'My life as a modern-day slave'

UNOCAL case

UNOCAL wins - kind of
This is an article concerning one of the cases I have been doing work on at my job. The judge kind of ruled against us. It's kind of a bummer. It makes me feel sad about the state of the world. Although, one of the attorneys said that the judge stated that UNOCAL should have known human rights abuses would have occurred, which makes us all think that she holds them somewhat accountable. Who knows? People are strange and conflicted.

Happy My Birthday

So, yeah, I had a really nice birthday weekend. Had a small gathering at home. Got some nice maternity gear and candles and - the highlight - some great David Bowie records. I love David Bowie. He's a genius. I'm on a Bowie-worship jag right now. Aram also got the Ziggy Stardust movie on DVD which has 2 soundtracks. We will have many joyful hours watching this.

I saw the baby ripple last night. Just like Alien. I was too tired to jump up and down about it though. Long work day. I'm excited to go home and sleep today.

Grumpy Day

I'm not so good on the emotional front today. I'm feeling kinda depressed and bummed out. I would like to relax and sleep for 12 hours.

I'm conflicted about what to do for my birthday. Mostly I would like to sit around in my underwear and play video games all day, but now we have people coming over and because while there are 3 or 4 people who wouldn't mind my underwear, the rest of the invitees would probably appreciate my being bathed and dressed.

I'm truly turning into my mother. I just want to be relaxed all the time. Comfortable shoes, comfortable clothes, everything. Maybe it's just a by-product of being pregnant.

Maybe I'm bummed because it's cloudy. Or because I need a vacation in a beautiful tropical place. Like the summer in LA. Or maybe I'm not having enough chicken. Or maybe maybe maybe.

Oh well, anyway, I will figure something out.

Feeling really big today

I think today is my first really big feeling day. I want to slouch, although my yoga training doesn't want me to. The doctor told me yesterday that I am no longer permitted to sleep on my back. It cuts off circulation to both me and the little boy.

But, man when that big feeling hits, it hits hard. I can't step up high without groaning, can't lean forward without grunting, can't tie my shoes without sitting down. Unless I do this odissi yoga pose that is like the chair pose with one foot on the opposite knee, which actually feels really good on the hips and is great for balance. Yoga is the best.

Anyway, all of my bones are shifting and my joints are loose and cracking; you know, the regular joys of pregnancy. And the belly feels tight. And I know he's just going to get bigger, and just wait until I really want the little guy out. Oy.

In the meantime, we've been enjoying reading to him and singing to him. He's really cool, so far. :)

Fainting

Hi D,

Did you call your doctor about this one? You might want to. Masha and I agree. ;-)

Love, Kim

Thanks you guys for your concern. I saw the doctor today for a routine appointment and told her about my dizzy spell. She said "That happens sometimes" and I just have to stay hydrated and eat sufficiently in the morning. They baby and I are both healthy. All the tests came back normal. All is as uneventful as one could hope.

YAY!

Today's horoscope

"January 13, 2004
Try to keep your mind aligned with your emotions today, DUNIA. It is quite possible that a powerful yet subtle force is slowly pulling you off the track. If this is the case, you should think about taking a break and doing some fast paced physical activity to get your heart rate up and your blood pumping. Going for a jog with a friend will help clear your head and make you think more rationally about the decisions you need to make."

I think not, my dear astrologers. Today I experienced a wild dizzy spell which landed me on the ground in front of the elevators at the parking garage at work. My heart was pumping, alright. I was sweating and everything. I guess I have to wake up earlier and actually make myself breakfast. Or follow those middle-of-the-night hungerpangs to the fridge and fix myself snacks in the middle of the night. This little boy is already so demanding!

Nerd-dom

So today I overslept due to a Lord of the Rings related dream. I am clearly entering the true realm of nerd-dom. It was actually a really cool dream. I was walking through a museum of Lord of the Rings paraphernalia and whenever I touched something I got a glimpse into the actor as the character who wore it, the same way whoever touched the Ring saw the Great Eye. So I touched this cool green and gold armor and saw Aragorn. You know, stuff like that.

Baby likes a good beat. And hot chocolate. He's doing great. We're doing great. Stuff is just great all around.

Good luck to Gail, everyone. Her doctor says she's giving birth on 2/9, but I think it'll be more like 1/27. She hates me saying that, but hey, if that's what it seems like, that's what it seems like.

Talk to y'all soon

Happy New Year, everyone

Our baby boy made his first strong kick on New Year's Day. I was on the phone with my mother. It was all very exciting. We are doing very well despite world events. We have a gig on Wednesday, so all of you in LA best show up at the Temple Bar at 8:30!!!

Ok, back to work now.